Sunday, October 14, 2012

Finding Balance

 Balance is the point where the spiritual, physical and emotional aspects of our personalities meet and concur” –Deirdre Lovell
It's funny to realize, every day, how life works. Do you know when you get a car, that you believe to be totally unique, just to realize, after you buy it,that every other person in town has the same model.Or you think about someone you haven't heard or talked to for a while, that person, just out of the blue, send you a note or make a call? Well this happens to me, a lot.
Last week it was one of those weeks, sometimes feeling something out of a 'twilight zone' episode. In almost every conversation I have had, either be with friends, family, colleagues or just complete strangers with whom I stroke a casual conversation while waiting for an appointment or at the market line...in almost every one of them we end up striking one common point, balance. We start with a light and easy chat about the week, work, weather, flowers, the coming summer - which makes most of the New Englanders excited - and then, it shifts into family and how to balance the personal, family, social and professional life in order to be able to do all the things that are important without losing touch with the things that are only ours, without losing ourselves.

How can we still be an individual with ideas, dreams and realizations at the same time as being a 'professional', 'employer', 'employee', 'mothers', 'daughters', 'husbands and wifes', 'partners', 'fathers' and 'sons'. How to be everything else that we are suppose to be and still be the person, that unique and original individual, we all wanted to become? How to create and live a well balanced and satisfying life in the meantime? How to hold the scale in the middle, without shifting too much to one side or the other?

I guess we all have a list of things we want to achieve in life....Finding Balance is the second goal in my life goal list, and I have learned that it is a lifelong process, it's a daily chore and require practice, lots of practice. It's not something you learn today, apply and let it go, counting on 'it' to have a life in its own. It's something that requires daily attention and dedication. You know, almost like educating your children...how many times did you repeat or hear your parents say 'What do you say...?' when you want to your children to learn how to say 'thank you'...balancing life is something like that...it's a everyday, every hour, every minute activity and has more to do with time management than you would like to believe.

Creating order in our daily routines works, and works well. A path is not a path with one stepping stone in the beginning and one in the end. It requires one stone after the other, going somewhere to be an actual path. Order, will allow you to make time for what's important to you. For me, making lists~ which I usually put together at night, after checking the ones I had for the day that is ending ~ works well. It does feel good to see my daily list all checked out and motivates me to keep on doing what I am doing.

My first 2 hours of the day are usually reserved to myself, no cell phone, no computer...it's a time I take to myself, to read, write, meditate, take photos, walk on the beach, enjoy my cup of coffee, do yoga or anything that I have pleasure on doing. This is what is important to me, at this time in my life.

Focus on whatever is that is important to you, work with a good schedule and add them into your to-do list. Seriously, if it's your family, shut off all the external influences and distractions (unless you are a surgeon or an attorney with a client on the death row scheduled to be executed today), really, stay with them and enjoy the time you have together. It's the quality of the moments spent together that create unforgettable memories, not the quantity.

Make those minutes, hours or days worth. It's important to stick to it. I usually say to myself: 'If this was an appointment with a client, I would not miss for the world.' If I am ready to overcome any obstacle to honor an appointment with a client who, sometimes I have yet to meet, why I would not be able to make to the 'appointment' with myself, my family, friends or to what is really important to me? Don't take me wrong, yes my clients are important, they are my livelihood but, if I don't care for myself, I will not have much to offer to then either.

Start right now - make lists, enter on your tablet, iphone, make post its...whatever works for you. Start with tackling just a couple of things on the list so you don’t get overwhelmed at first. Start with baby steps...make a little list and add one thing you want at a time. You don't have to read a whole book in one day...reading one chapter or a page a day is a great way to do. The habit makes the monk isn't that as the saying goes?

A new month starts tomorow, it's a great opportunity to start something new. So start today and enjoy!
Noemi Cardoso 04/30/2012

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